Look what you did to me, baby.

May 26, 2009

I must say, WordPress is kind of daunting with that daily statistics graphic. It makes you feel bad about taking a long weekend and not blogging, cos you see the numbers just drop off. And I just imagine all you readers coming by and going “Nothing… still?!” Caramba. Well let’s see if we can’t start pulling that line up again.

In a bit of a bored stupor last week, I started killing time on YouTube and watching old Michael Jackson videos. There’s something kind of reassuring about Michael Jackson videos — not those long-ass mini-movies like “Thriller” (I know, I know, it’s sacreligious to say anything bad about that video and album), “Smooth Criminal,” “Ghosts” and all that, but seeing “Billie Jean,” “Black or White” and “Leave Me Alone” again was kind of cool and reminded me of the guy’s power before he started getting a little too content telling people how much he loved children.

And then for the first time, I actually watched the “You Rock My World” video from 2001. I know it was pretty inescapable that year, as an all out media campaign was launched to reestablish Michael as some great musical force, but — “You Rock My World” aside — Invincible was sh*t, and the public took a look at Michael and decided they didn’t really feel comfortable looking at him anymore.

I never watched the full video in college because it was another 15-minute affair, and frankly there were better things for me to do then sit in front of a TV to try appreciating the thing.

Plus it was just awkward to try to watch it. Michael and Chris Tucker “ooooh”-ing after girls for the first minute and looking at this guy and thinking, “Really? He’s gonna get one of those girls?” I mean watch this at the 1:14 mark, where Michael goes into the little girlish “Oh my God, Chris…” routine. This is the same guy who was spouting off about how bad he was 14 years prior.

And aside from following this girl into a club to try to impress her with his dance moves, why does he smash the bar up? Why even get Marlon Brando for that part? Why does he beat the hell out of all these mobster thugs and then scream for Chris Tucker like a little girl when a paltry little fire starts? WTF?

At any rate, the song is much more enjoyable without visual accompaniment. And the single mix is even better, because it drops that whole dialogue between Michael and Chris talking about how Michael can or cannot get the girl the song is apparently about.

Michael Jackson – You Rock My World (Single Mix)

And 10 bucks says he maybe does one of the 1,000 shows or whatever her promised in London later this year. Maybe one. Maybe.

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